Waiting. I hate waiting. By nature, I’m quite an impatient person. Once I decide that I want something, it doesn’t take long before I’m trying to get it. I’m not into this whole decide what you want, wait, save and then get it mentality. I’d rather just get it straight off. That’s how I work.
However, at the moment, I’ve been forced into a time of waiting, and this time there’s not really anything I can do about it. Having just finished my degree, I’m in the process of looking for jobs in an environment that seems to be laying off more people than it is hiring. Seeing as how I don’t really know what I want to do, this process is proving pretty tricky.
So I’m having to wait. Sure, there are pro-active things I can do, such as job-hunting and keeping my eyes open for work. But because I’m trusting God to give me the right job at the right time, I’m being forced to wait on Him.
This goes against every grain of my mentality.
But I’m convinced it’s a good thing. One of my friends is going through the same thing, and she mentioned a phrase coined by Oswald Chambers: ‘Gracious Uncertainty.’ It’s the idea that living a life all planned and perfect is a common sense approach, but living an uncertain, unplanned and often uncomfortable life is the sign of a Spirit-led life.
I honestly think that, whilst waiting is often intensely uncomfortable and at time times painful, God teaches us and moulds us during these times. It’s when we’re forced to wait on God that we learn to rely on Him again, to depend on Him and run back into His arms. It’s often when we’re waiting on God that He reveals Himself to us, and gives us a glimpse of His glory and vision for our lives.
Seasons of waiting are not always particularly fun. At times, they can seem incredibly hard and extremely painful. But I honestly believe they are necessary. I believe they are a way of God drawing us back to Him, of us re-kindling our love and passion for Him. So in the wilderness of waiting, I’m learning to return to the one thing that is always true: God.